How do you feel if you get to know that people from your centre don't support you but instead backstabbed your bloddy trust that you gave her since the day you be part of the team? And pathetically, its your team manager that is incharge of you.

No wonder, people that had already excel in your place had gone to other place, no matter how far it takes to go for trainings that worth their money. And here, i would say that, i will drift my ass of your bloody centre. This also clearly explains why the hell you centre have only a number of people that i can count with my 5 dreadful fingers.

I hate you. I seriously do.
Insolent.

You go behind my back telling my opponent my weak points and my injury. Well, ALLAH is with me. I pray for the best and everything is to HIS will.

The point that i injured gone bad. I got more phobiatic. I enjoyed silat. Alot. But now, people around me had gone too far. Pushing me over my limits. Imagine, one whole week you go for trainings. When even the people around you realise that you are facing a tough fight later. Somehow, i will do my uberly best to bring 'national' players down. Even if takes for me to lose. I will lose with pride and win with dignity. I will prove to that old cocky woman that i can be better than the person she supports. And after that, i will make my move out of her centre. I HATE HER. seriously i do.

During olahraga training, i did regu myself. To get the tempo the beat, the timing the stances, the strength. Then when i mit up with my members, its time to synchronize. i know, or somehow know that they thought i may not be serious when comes to training days, but for goodness sake, i don't take it lightly. But im dividing my time for both. For tanding and seni equally.

I had this feeling that i won't get the scholarship. Everytime i got back home, the only question i asked is, "Got any letters?" and the answer is always no. Oh c'mon. I know this is not the dead end, but this is the only way for me to go through poly life without any hiccups. Dear ALLAH, help me.


Labels : Exhausted i am.